Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her – Ephesians 5:25

One of the most despicable things to witness is a man who turns his wife into a punching bag. 

A man marries a woman under the pretext of love and takes her into his home. The man delights in her cooking, her laundering of his clothes, and entertaining his friends. He goes out to drink with his buddies and comes home drunk and out of it. Then he sits down to eat and complains about the food his wife has labored with love to prepare for the family. Smelling like a fish, he does not care to take a shower. Yet he wants to have a nocturnal delight with the woman he calls his wife. The poor woman may remark on his unacceptable behavior, and suddenly, she becomes a punching bag. Does such a man love his wife? How does he take his wife in the first place? Does he take her as a property bought with money or as a maid hired to serve him? 

Until a man comes to a proper knowledge of who a woman is, and the relationship God created between the woman and man, he will never know how to live with and treat his wife with dignity. If the only knowledge a husband has concerning his wife comes from traditional definitions and norms, the man will always abuse the woman. He will never experience the beauty of God’s creation in her. 

Over the years since Adam and Eve disobeyed God’s commandment and sin destroyed the beautiful environment and balance in the Garden of Eden, man has sought to domineer the woman (Gen. 2:16). Societies developed traditions and customs to regulate the beautiful relationship between the wife and the husband the first couple shared when God instituted marriage (Gen. 2:22-25). Men have misused their authority as heads of their households and their brute strength to abuse women, subjecting them to conditions of slavery in many communities. 

But thank God for Christ Jesus, the situation has changed. Christ has brought back the dignity of women and, through His finished work on Calvary, has brought the marriages of those who live for Him back to the Garden experience (Gal. 3:28). 

One time, when the Pharisees questioned Jesus on divorce and the rule of Moses (Deut. 24:1), Jesus said Moses gave that ruling because of their hard-heartedness. It was not how God instituted marriage in the Garden of Eden (Matt. 19:7-8). Marriage was different, and now purity in marriage has become part of our salvation package (Heb. 13:4). 

Paul establishes three refreshing conditions for the Spirit-filled husband in Ephesians 5:22-31

First, a husband must love his wife sacrificially in the manner of Christ’s love for His church (25). 

Second, a husband’s love must nurture his wife and bring her to maturity in Christ Jesus (26-27).

Finally, a husband’s love must bring fulfillment to his wife (vv.28-31).

A husband who loves his wife this way is the real man the world celebrates today. Everybody else must bow in shame before Christ. 

Happy Father’s Day!