Proverbs 27:6 

New International Version (NIV)

Wounds from a friend can be trusted,
    but an enemy multiplies kisses.

For Meditation

Let’s be honest. A rebuke can sting like a bee and take the joy out of a victory lap and deflate the ego. However, it’s a necessary part of our relationships. Much like honest criticism and pushback before a familiar audience, a rebuke unsettles the nerves and drains the throat of moisture. Nobody invites it, and the worst is when it lands unexpectedly. However, an open rebuke or criticism is preferable to the pretentious kisses of an enemy (Prov 27:6), so smooth and assiduously calibrated to relax its victim into disgrace, failure, or death. A loyal friend will not keep quiet when they know your choice will end in disgrace or disaster. They will speak a word of rebuke or call you out in love when you’re wrong.

Many are the enemies who conceal their motives with shows of affection but with hidden daggers behind them. They are the Joabs (2 Sam 3:27) and Judases (Lk 22:47-48). Our only hope with them is discernment and wisdom from God, for it is through His guidance that we can distinguish genuine friends from those who would harm us. With God guiding us, we can feel secure in our relationships, knowing He is leading us to the right people. 

So, I have a question for you. Are you a true friend? Would you call me out when I’m wrong and warn me before I embarrass myself? Would you be honest with me, even if it’s difficult, or would you spare my feelings by lying? Why would you choose my ego over preventing a mistake or embarrassment? If I were about to make an unwise choice, would you voice your concerns or not? Remember, it’s this kind of honest feedback that makes friendships real and lasting, showing how much we value each other.             

Parents sometimes think that silence, or lack of rebuke, is protective of their children. They believe it is the best way to show them love, but it is not. Eli made that mistake and lost his two sons on the same day when God’s wrath fell on them in battle with the Philistines (1 Sam 2:34; 4:11). Holding back rebukes or failing to point out the faults of children and friends instead makes us enemies rather than friends. Why should they fall before coming around to comfort them?

Praise God; He is our Father and best Friend in Christ. He rebukes the children He loves (Heb 12:6). He calls us to become like Him, saying something to a friend in love when we have to, their anger and hurt notwithstanding. This call is the essence of rebuke, an act of love that manifests God’s care for us. Let us show this love to our friends by rebuking them when necessary, always intending to guide them towards the right path. 

So, may you be a friend who loves always, and may your friendship bring mutual joy to you for looking after each other.   

Shalom

Pray with Me

Father, please help me be a friend like you to those I love, never holding back a word of rebuke, but always looking out for their interests with loving and timely interventions. Amen!

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